>Hell, I wish the title applied to my current mood, but sadly, I can honestly say it doesn’t. Not by a mile. Wanna know why I’m not one of the shiny happy people right now? Hmmm, let’s see. I had only one week of vacation this semester, when the rule is that you get TWO! Just one, seven days and shit-all. Now, that wouldn’t be so bad, because even a week of free time is very welcome in my opinion, but since God doesn’t exist, or if he does, He’s not really on my side, I spent most of my precious week of vaca taking some retarded workshop that really didn’t do much for me other than rip me off my sixty bucks. I hate this shit. Then, the two days left of my week I’ll have to devote them to reading some seriously b o o o r i n g readings about the WTO and some crap that I really could care less about. The kicker to this story is that our dearly beloved dean made us take this useless workshop because she said we had to and well… you can’t argue with her, and now she made us waste our week of rest, which we needed TONS more than the workshop! The new semester is going to be nuts! Seriously, I need a gun right now, and not necessarily to kill her. Although that doesn’t sound like such a bad idea.
So, since all I can do decently in life is listen to music to pass the time and get over my depression, I made a playlist (another one… bear with me, please) that would resemble my mood right now IF I HAD HAD MY WEEK OFF! Kind of a alternate reality sort of thing… with music. Now, personally, I am the kind to rub the depression right in my face and make it worse by listening to painfully sad crap, because I’m sadistic like that, but now we’ll do the opposite. I’m gonna list ten happy songs and see if they work on me and make me happy. I doubt it, but you can’t blame me for trying, can you?
Lush – I Wanna Be Your Girlfriend
I know, don’t hit me! This song is what you listen to when your name is Candy and you like The Jonas Brothers OMG! Well, not quite. And no offense if your name is Candy. This song has the weird ability to make me happy, even if it’s only for a few minutes. That slut whore Avril Lavigne ripped off this song, which in turn is a cover of some song by some guy or other… I don’t know all that much, ok? Great shoegaze band, almost as good as Slowdive, not as good as My Bloody Valentine, though. But still, they are hands down cheerful.
Shriekback – Nemesis
Yay! British New Wave is sooooo fun! This is a little band that got me somewhat hooked for like a second, then became more of a novelty to me and then just lost most of its appeal. Still, I cannot say they’re bad. And this song is just the epitome of happy! Taken from Oil & Gold, this is one good, easy way to get your happy back!
Talk Talk – Today
Shit, again with the British new wave! This is actually more New Romantic than New Wave, which still sounds just like New Wave to me but more dramatic. I don’t know, this song is sort of happy. Reminds me of Flashdance. What a feeling! This is not so much happy as energetic, but you need energy to be happy, right? Extra points for the album artwork. Haha, that artwork is funny… if not, then at least it’s colorful. Color is happiness, right?
Pavement – Summer Babe (Winter Version)
You can never go wrong with Pavement. Especially because they have a wide array of happy music that you can sing, shake your booty, jump and just enjoy yourself to. Plus, they are immensely good, so you won’t feel stupid for acting retarded to Pavement. Okay, maybe you will, but who cares! It’s not like you’re gonna do it in public. Although if you do, you probably are retarded. Get away from Pavement, if that’s the case, then.
David Bowie – Suffragette City
Reverend Bowie can do no wrong, honestly. In fact, I think I would buy an album entirely made up of him belching and burping if he made it. Because it would be a masterpiece. This little album is what made Bowie Bowie (The Rise and Liberation of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars) and it couldn’t be any other way, this album is as legendary as the man who made it.
Devo – Big Mess
Anything off of Devo’s catalog is happy. I chose this song because it’s my favorite. I could have chosen Whip It, because it is happier, but then again, Whip It is more cliche, so fuck it. This one works just fine, though. I tell you, New Wave is the shit when you wanna smile. And Devo just has this innate humorous quality to it that makes it hard for you not to enjoy it. Must be Mark Mothersbaugh’s glasses… hehe.
1000 Homo DJs – Supernaut
Covers are good when the band making them is good and they know what they’re doing. Except for that Devo cover of NIN’s Head Like a Hole… God, what were they thinking? But that’s because… well, I don’t know, but that’s like the only exception to the rule. I know many covers, some great, some not so much, some pathetic, but nothing like this one. This song, originally by Black Sabbath, fills you with stamina better than a can of Red Bull, coffee and speed altogether. Shit, this song makes you want to go outside, steal a bike and go on a tough biker adventure, leather and all. No? Well, maybe I’m the only one who gets those ideas, but you get my point. This song is the product of some evil tweaking and nipping and tucking from Al Jourgensen’s part, and some input from His Holiness, Master Trent Reznor, of some little known act I kind of dig called the Nine Inch… something. Sadly, I don’t have the WaxTrax! version of this song, which is gracefully enhanced by the enchanting voice of Mr. Reznor, but this one, with Jourgensen on vocals, is pretty cool as well. Supernaut!
Black Kids – I’m Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You
Fuck yes, the Black Kids! Indie at its best! They’re not from New York, which sucks, but they could as well be, they are so worth being part of the NY indie scene. And yeah, they’re dancey and kind of pop and all but they’re good and fuck you if you say I’m stupid for liking the Black Kids. I mean it. This song, which can be found on both the Partie Traumatic album and the Wizard of Ahhhs EP, makes it impossible for you not to smile. Seriously, who can resist such a fun song?!
Moving Units – Between Us and Them
A beautiful band from Los Angeles, opened for Nine Inch Nails for like two nights and became one of my favorites. I have to give this to Trent, he does know about music. And it’s funny how we just seem to have the same taste in music. This song is part of a great debut album called Dangerous Dreams, and this band is part of a great music movement called post-punk revival. Together, the Moving Units make one of the most exciting new acts out there right now. Check them out.
Dead Kennedys – Too Drunk to Fuck
About time some real badass music made the cut. Yeah, I was getting tired of this nice, politically-correct bullshit music, let’s bring the most dangerous band in America! Those guys whose lead singer ran for governor of California and actually lost because the world is fucked up. Seriously though, Jello Biafra would have beat the shit out of good ol’ Governator Schwarzenegger as head of the state. I mean, this is the guy who dared to speak out and say shit like it was with his groundbreaking music, this is the guy who wrote Holiday In Cambodia because he was sick and tired of the tyranny of all modern-day forms of government. This was the guy who wanted freedom of speech for everyone. This was the guy who wrote ‘and now I got diarrhea, too drunk to fuck!’ Well, you can say as much as you want about Jello Biafra and the Dead Kennedys, but this song is funny, and it’s fun, and it’s great because it just cracks my shit up. So there.
Nine Inch Nails – Physical
Oh my God. See? This is what I was talking about when I said that thing about covers. Of course, TRez knows what he’s doing, and even his worst crap is so good it puts everything else out there to shame. This lovely cover of an Adam & the Ants song, which is amazing in itself, I might add, blows up the cool-meter and thus submits every other song to its mighty coolness. How can it not be fucking cool, it features Maise (Trent’s former dog, now in dog heaven, R.I.P.) on backup vocals at the beginning, and is one of the few songs in which you can hear Trent breathing and moaning and panting and screaming like he has his beautiful hands down in his pants. This song is sexy as hell, and sexy is happy. Extra points for that bit at the end of the first chorus where he makes… very sexy, explicit noises that dear Cat here immensely appreciates. Yum.
Those are my ten happy songs that I picked from the trash bin and cleaned up with toilet paper and saliva for your pleasure and entertainment. I had fun listening to this playlist, I smiled, I laughed, I jumped… and as soon as it was over, some stupid Current 93 song came up and I was back in the gutter. Fuck.
See ya later, I’m gonna go find that gun now.
Listening to: Feist – The Limit to Your Love
Eating: A doughnut! Can you believe it? I’m eating!
Drinking: Uh… shit, I’m thirsty.